Losing Lana...finding my Lois Lane

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Years ago, I was deep in love with a girl, oh how beautiful she was; every moment with her was a preparation for eternity spent just with her; her smile, eyes, hair and lips, a perfect piece of the masterpiece she is, what about her laughter ? The sweetest melody I ever heard. It was impossible to think of life without her, in fact I really didn't feel my day had a meaning if I hadn't seen or spoken with her. This is just a little justice done in describing how much I loved Maya.


Just like you guessed , she didn't love me in return, she would treat me like trash, insult me, go out with other guys and still ask for favors from me, I was the love and standby she could run to only when her back was against the wall, saying my heart bled is just an understatement as I constantly endured it all despite knowing all her faults and misdeeds, to me I was deeply in love, what could be wrong with that. I took it all in for a long time till she broke the news to me that she was pregnant, it was like I got sentenced to death by hanging; we both knew I wasn't responsible cause I never even thought about having sex with her before marriage, so again it was glaring to my blind eyes that Maya had been cheating but it still didn't matter, come on Maya it's not the end of the world we can find a way round this and sort it out. We are getting married was her reply. I don't remember proposing to you yet though but I plan to, was going to ask you on your birthday, it's like you're reading my mind, not you Zach, I'm getting married to someone else, the date has been fixed, I'm sorry but it's over between us. 

My heart wasn't, broken or shattered, it was crushed to powder, I was too weak to reply or even say anything as she left. I went into depression for the next two weeks, ate but it wasn't like finding satisfaction through food, it was just to keep living, in fact I didn't want to keep living anymore. I transformed into looking like a junkie rejected from rehab,this was my end. Suicide? Nah... I'm not that brave to commit suicide but I hoped someone could do it for me. How could I be so foolish and blind, I deserved to be flogged by Nigerian soldiers and after that taken to the barracks. All my friends tried their best in talking to me but it didn't help cause all they kept saying was the usual " women! Don't trust women o, open your eye, treat them like trash, me ? I no dey take nonsense o,three women must be there as options. Must this be the story, I know you could find love and build something magical but I guess I wasn't just...is this going to be my fate, cause I wasn't prepared to open my heart anymore or trust any lady again. 

My mentor got wind of the story, he had warned me countless times about Maya but I was just unreasonable and stubborn , so when it happened he came visiting and all I expected was the best insult and rebuke money could buy but instead all he said was "Zach, you like Clark Kent are a man of destiny but sometimes life will take away your Lana just because you deserve a Lois Lane and it just wants to give you one". 

That was it... It was like cool water, soothing and healing to my wounded heart...my Lois Lane. Smallville and the Superman story was my favorite but then I was always disgusted by Clark Kent's foolishness towards his first love Lana Lang, I was a regular customer in supplying the character insults whenever I saw the series but here I was doing the exact thing without my cognizance. This was my ice breaker, I needed to find my Lois Lane.

The world is filled with people just like me who are stuck with something that is far below their worth, it could be a relationship, job or anything else but all you have experienced has been nothing short of degrading; all that you have at the moment may just be that guy or job but trust me dear one, there is someone and something there for you with your name on it and him. Sometimes, it could be difficult letting go, trust me it's always painful especially when it looks like that is all you've got and any separation from that would mean the end of you.

Change is painful, letting go is painful but you must believe that you deserve so much better and you can't believe this until you recognize who you are, the value you have and stuff you are made of. This is why living in the consciousness and mastery of your identity is priceless and by this I mean an identity that has been deconstructed of its negative , unwholesome materials and foibles then reconstructed with knowledge, wisdom and vision bringing the vision in this case being the person into reality.

When you find that which is truly yours and meant for you, there comes a peace and satisfaction with it that you cannot trade for anything in the world, there would be challenges but every challenge faced with that person or in that job or whatever it may be will be worth it and would get you more matured. 

Many a time we hold on to that which is below what we deserve, we cling to it like death will be imminent the moment such is taking from us, trust me when Life decides to take away that which is below what you deserve just because it wants to give you something or someone better or take you somewhere better, it rarely considers how you feel or the pain you will endure, you know why? 

The joy of receiving the true blessing exceeds the pain of enduring the curse in disguise.

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