US-based Ghanaian Pastor Sylvester Ofori, 35 years, has killed his beautiful wife, Barbara Tommey, 27 years. They married on 19th September, 2015. Unfortunately, 11 days to their 5th Anniversary, on 8th September, 2020, husband shot wife to death. Too many THEORIES and TALKERS are flying on social media on what Barbara should or shouldn't have done.
Some think Barbara shouldn't have stayed in an abusive relationship, she should have reported the husband to the police, "Pastors have the worst marriages", etc. As Counsellor Daniel Fenyi let me give you some contexts to, at least, help your talkativeness and rushy opinions.
1. Barbara didn't stay in an abusive relationship. She was not a fool pls. She left, even if after "too many" family persuasions. At the time of her death, she was divorcing the husband. The couple were staying at two separate places. It's believed the divorce could have even triggered the murder (maybe, the man was angered by what he'll lose in the divorce process). Pastor Sylvester planned the evil, and executed it, even in public probably because he couldn't have met Barbara in any private place since they were no longer together.
2. Barbara married an "anointed" Man of God. The husband is very rich with rumoured net worth of USD 5million. In American standard, he is a rich Man of God. If this Rich Man of God who has the gift of prophecy and runs his own church proposes love to any lady, the tendency to agree is very high. Barbara did no wrong marrying a 'rich anointed Man of God', many ladies would have done same if in her shoes.
3. Love, sometimes lust, in its real sense, suspends Logic. If you ever see anyone acting unreasonably in love, don't blame her. It's an inherent feature of Love. Barbara may have been unreasonably forgiving towards the husband. Though she divorced, she didn't want to report him to the police. Point is, Love and Logic is a thing which over 90% of people are not able to balance, perfectly. Have you seen/heard a University Professor "kneel down" to beg a Level 100 lady student for sex before? That's what I mean by Love, lust suspends Logic.
4. Barbara is a pure Victim of Love. Stop all the nonsense theories. Many of us do all the supposed "right" things in our relationship yet still, we are abused, cheated upon, humiliated, divorced, etc. It's because you are not dead/killed yet that's why you feel you're better off. Though we'll all die one day, our prayer is that it should not be caused by someone we decided to love and marry.
5. Everybody, even kids, are talking about Barbara as if they understand love any better. The world should shut up! We are talking too much! Allow Barbara to RIP. Allow her family to mourn a beautiful destiny truncated on the altar of LOVE. Call it Foolish Death, I call her LOVE MARTYR!
I hear Barbara would have forgiven Sylvester and not revenged, if she were to be alive. Such a beautiful soul...!
Counsellor Daniel Fenyi
Counsellor | Educationist
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